The 'Nun Bun' Has Been Stolen - You Bastards!

The infamous pastry that resembles Mother Theresa has been thieved. Please help the FPT and the authorities find and return this priceless pastry. More info from wkrn.com: "Nine years after a muffin came out of the oven with an uncanny resemblance to Mother Teresa, that Nun Bun has been stolen. The Nun Bun heist has put a sad face on the person who first discovered it.
It was ineffable, it was inedible, but now it's gone. Early Christmas morning, an evil grinch pried the door off the Bongo Java cafe and got away with the cinnamon bun.
Before it was stolen, anyone who came into the cafe could see the bun. It sat on a shelf below the cash register. A large cup fill with change and a piggy bank sitting next to the roll were not taken. The roll, which was hard as a rock, had been there a while.
Ryan Finney, discovered the Nun Bun. When he first saw Mother Teresa in the bun, it made big news. Was it a miracle? Who knows? But Finney, who is not Catholic, has been watching over the roll ever since.
Bongo Java's owner Bob Bernstein, dubbed the bun, the Mother Teresa Cinnamon Bun and had T-shirts made up. Soon thereafter, he got a letter from Calcutta from Mother Teresa. The famous missionary didn't want her image or her name used for a commercial purpose. Bernstein decided then to call it the Immaculate Confection. Mother Teresa didn't like that either, so it became the Nun Bun.
According to Bernstein, Mother Teresa discussed the T-shirts bearing her likeness on her deathbed. Her lawyer asked her what she wanted to do about the Nun Bun. Mother Teresa laughed and pointed to her successor, Sister M Nirmala, and said, "find a roll that looks like her."
The Nun Bun Heist has brought the pastry some national publicity, once again. The story appeared on the front page of the Tennessean on Monday, and was covered by ABC and CNN as well.

Foodstuff of The Week: The Red Onion

This week's featured foodstuff is the red onion. As simple as it is complex, the red onion works on so many levels. The research crew here found some history on the wwiz.com:

"The ubiquitous onion has a long, distinguished history and, like garlic, has been endowed with healing properties and mystical significance. For the ancient Egyptians, the onion's nine encircling layers represented eternity. Two thousand years ago, Egyptian princes were reputed to have spent 90 tons of gold buying them just to keep the workmen laboring on the pyramids in good health and spirits. That's a lot of gold and a whole lot of onions!

Throughout world history, onions have been thought of as food for the poor, since the strong odor and taste offended the palates of the wealthy. Yet history also reveals that onions were grown in the gardens of kings, such as Ur-Nammu of Ur in 2100 B.C.

The onion's spherical shape and concentric rings made it a powerful symbol for the universe and for the sun god. The round layers of the onion represented heaven, hell, earth and the universe. The form of the onion was a powerful image of divine perfection.

The vegetable itself was sometimes treated as a sacred object. Some Egyptians would swear their oaths on an onion, as a guarantee of good faith. Priests would not eat them, maybe as a sign of religious commitment or as a way of impressing the public with a feat of abstinence. Mourners and worshipers would sometimes bring onions as funeral gifts during the Old Kingdom period (c. 2615 to 2175 B.C.). A basket of onions was second only to bread as a valued offering. Onions appear in chapel altar pictures; in fact, Egyptian craftsmen would sculpt several vegetable forms in precious metals for the priests to use as temple offerings to the gods.

Still, the most intriguing fact about the onion as it existed in Egypt is in its relationship to the afterlife. According to James E. Harris and Kent R. Weeks, authors of X-Raying the Pharaohs: `They (Egyptians) recognized death, of course, but for them it was not the final, absolute end. Rather, it was the continuation of life in a different form. What they enjoyed and found pleasant in this life they tried to take with them in the next. To insure this, techniques of mummification were developed."

In this process, onions and garlic had both a spiritual and a physical role to play. The body of a deceased person had to be preserved for eternity to insure a "lasting home for the soul," and offerings, including food were placed in or near the tomb to be on hand in the afterlife. Sometimes real food was used, but sometimes scenes or sculpture depicted the items, which became ``real" through rites of magic. Some Egyptologists theorize that onions may have been used because their strong scent and/or magical powers would prompt the dead to breathe again. Other Egyptologists believe it was because onions and garlic were known for their strong antiseptic qualities, which were construed as magical and would be handy in the afterlife.

We do not know exactly when the onion reached Greece. According to Waverley Root in Food, by the time of the Athenian statesman Pericles (born c. 95 B.C.), the market of Athens was selling edible plants. Most of these vegetables were expensive and sold in small quantities, but onions were abundant–and affordable. That is probably why they were widely consumed, especially by the poor. It may also be why they were fed to soldiers.

The Israelites partook of Egyptian onions before Moses let them into Canaan. In the book of Numbers, in the story of the hardships of the odyssey, the Israelites speak fondly of the foods they had enjoyed and leeks, onions and garlic were among the six things that were mentioned.

Centuries later, Pliny the Elder, Rome's keen-eyed observer, wrote of Pompeii's onions before he was overcome and killed by the volcano's heat and fumes. Excavators of the doomed city would later find gardens where, just as Pliny had said, onions had grown. The bulbs had left behind telltale cavities in the ground.

From ancient times, onions have marched through history, a staple and universal foodstuff. They remained that way until the dawn of science, awaiting the magic of contemporary botanists, who would make the humble onion blossom into a bewildering array of shapes and forms.

Today onions are still so important that they are incorporated into everyday sayings, i.e. the French sometimes say, "Occupe toi de tes oignons" (Mind your business.)

500-Pound Man Accused of Fast-Food Grifting

Thanks to a loyal reader we have this story to share from you from the Local6 Florida News: "A 500-pound man in Seminole County, Fla., was arrested Tuesday on suspicion of scamming fast-food restaurants out of large amounts of milk shakes and tacos, according to a Local 6 News report. Jolicoeur would then call or visit the restaurants posing as a police officer or a firefighter and ask for a refund because there was a hair in his food, according to the report. "He would come back and say, 'Oh, there is something wrong with it,'" Seminole County Sheriff's spokesman Steve Olson said. "There was a hair in my shake or there was a hair in my tacos. And, then he wants his money back. "Jolicoeur was captured after he went to a Steak N' Shake restaurant near Oviedo and Taco Bell in Central Florida and allegedly tried to get money back for the food he ordered. Local 6 News reported that Jolicoeur has been arrested more than 24 times on charges of burglary, drugs and domestic problems, Local 6 News reported. "Jolicoeur's rap sheet is as thick as a book," Local 6 reporter Chris Trenkmann said. "When he was first checked into the jail in 1991, he weighed 360 pounds. This morning, the jail weighed him at 500 pounds."

Police in Sanford, Fla., and other cities are investigating the possibility that Jolicoeur was scamming area restaurants, Trenkmann said.

More info to come as we are following this unique story closely.

Bender Is Over - Back to Solid Quality Food

I have recovered from my bender of gorging on fast food and salted snack items. Thanks for your support (0 comments gd it!). ANyways, here is a picture of a lovely pot roast, garlic bread and brussell sprouts that are just about done and ready to eat.

2-Day Bender - Lord Please Help Me

I have been on a 2-day bender which has involved the consumption of way too much foodstuffs. Above is just the heap by the couch - I will not show photos of the kitchen area. I am soliciting help as I have a page of Arbys coupons and lunch is coming soon.

Fresh Oregon Coast Crab Pictures

Enjoy the look here at a reader's submission of his bounty from the Oregon Coast in the USA. Nice Work.

The FP Times Evening Meal - (additional snackage will follow)

I had some of the staff assemble a classic example of an FP evening meal. This is just the main course, it will be followed by some ice cream and a box of zingers as well. This is living.

5 Star Mexican Food: Sanchez Taqueria - Tigard, Oregon

The staff at the FP Times has enjoyed many fine mexican meals from in the country of Mexico itself and all the way up the US West Coast. We know authentic good mexican food. Sanchez Taqueria in Tigard,Oregon makes our exclusive 5-Star list. This smaller restaurant makes it food fresh daily and you can taste it. The salsas they offer up are also unique and excellent. If you are ever near this establishment it is a MUST VISIT restaurant. As you can see from the menu above - the prices are very reasonable and the portions are huge. Upon our next visit, we will take some photos of some dishes and post them here.

The Road To Recovery

The staff here is entering the final stages of the recovery process from the Thanksgiving Holiday and the bounty of foodstuffs consumed. Very soon things will become lively around here as usual.

Sprite "Aruba Mix" - Bad Timing or Bad Taste?

Sprite has recently released a beverage line titled "Aruba Mix". "Aruba Jam" is the third flavor in in the Sprite Remix series. Tropical and Berry were the two prior flavors released. With the whole Natalie Holloway issue still ongoing and the debate about Aruba's government authorities capabilities/willingness to deal with it, should Sprite not pull this product?

The Governor of Alabama has called for a boycott of the entire country (tourism and goods). From CNN: MONTGOMERY, Alabama (AP) -- Gov. Bob Riley called for a nationwide travel boycott of Aruba on Tuesday on behalf of a missing Alabama teenager's family, who accuse the island's government of not fully cooperating with the investigation into her disappearance. Riley asked his fellow governors to join him in urging the boycott of Aruba, where 18-year-old Natalee Holloway was last seen on May 30. "There are no other alternatives to get Aruban authorities to take this as seriously as they should," Riley said.

Debate is ongoing here at the FPT Test Kitchen.

We are encouraging you to post your opinion using the comments link on this post.

Barq's Root Beer Blog - The Blog With Bite!

The staff here at The Fat Pride Times have been long time drinkers of Diet Barq's and regular Barq's Root Beer. It is the best tasting diet beverage - no argument. Recently a reader pointed us to the Barq's Blog. This blog covers all thing Barq's and is very well done. Recommended link.

Barq's Blog

Yes We Have A Winner

Reader Senet correctly identified the plate of foodstuff in the previous posting. The winning comment was "That is some teriyaki chicken served over rice and broccoli, topped with hearty ginger slices. BOOYAH BOOYAH KABOO -Senet".

That is correct and Senet can now email us for his Arby's coupon.

5-Day 'Name That Meal' Contest - It's On

Can you name the foodstuff in the pictures above? Give it a shot by using the comments link below. Those who answer correctly - and answer must list the main multiple ingredients that compose the above dish will receive an Arby's coupon from our personal stash via regular mail.

Reader Submits Photo Of His Grocery Store: Frazier Foods

One of our readers, Mr. Bob Green, submitted to us the above photo of the market where he is the General Manager/CEO. Bob says he loves the info he gets here at The Fat Pride Times and plans to contribute some more things shortly.

Reader Calls For Pizza Hut To Offer BBQ Sauce For Individual Sale

A reader of the FP Times has called out for Pizza Hut to start selling it's tasty BBQ sauce for sale in individual bottles for home use. Pizza Hut uses this sauce on tehir BBQ chicken pizza and their hot wings as well. This sauce has a unique sweet and smokey flavor and we stand behind our reader in this call for action. Please help our efforts by emailing Pizza Hut and asking that it be made available for purchase as a stand-alone product.

Reader exclaims: "I Did Not Believe I Saw The Wienermobile Today"

Regular reader and contributor Magnum of PortalX Ventures experienced something incredible today. He saw the actual Wienermobile in person. Nuff Said.

Tootsie Pops: 100 down and more to go

We work late at the offices of The Fat Pride Times, so we had candy on hand for any trick or treaters. We gave full size candy bars and a handful of these Tootsie Pops. When all was done, we had about 3 huge bags of these suckers left. I have eaten over 100 since and I still am reaching for more as this is posted. Excellent candy. I dont care about 'how many licks it takes to get to the center' cause I just chomp em. FP Times recommends this candy product. I am trying to save the sticks and hope to have a picture of the massive pile up here shortly.

Everybody Loves Waffles - Right?

A reader sent us the excellent waffle themed images you see above. Everyone loves a good waffle. In fact, there are two days of the year set aside for them: International Waffle Day on March 25th and National (U.S.) Waffle Day on August 24th.

Here is some waffle history from mrbreakfast.com

13th Century A.C. - Ancient Greeks cook flat cakes between two metal plates. These early waffles were called obleios and were primarily savory in nature, prepared with cheeses and herbs.

1620 - The pilgrims bring Dutch "wafles" to America.

1735 - The word "waffle" - with two "f"s - appears in English print for the first time.

Late 1800's - Thomas Jefferson returns to the U.S. from France with a long handled, patterned waffle iron.

1869 - Cornelius Swarthout patents the first U.S. Waffle Iron.

1953 - Frank Dorsa's Eggo Frozen Waffles are sold in Supermarkets for the first time.

1964-65 - Brussels restaurateur Maurice Vermersch brings his wife's Brussels Waffle recipe to the World's Fair in New York. The fluffy yeast-infused waffle becomes a huge hit and becomes known as the Belgium waffle.

The Fat Pride Times Bagel Meal Plate

Here it is, the often spoken of FPT Bagelmeal. Takes 10 minutes to prepare and about 10 minutes to eat. Notice the seeds were not removed from the thick jalapeno slices.

Reader Debuts PortalX Webstore With Gourmet Food Offerings

Regular contributor to The Fat Pride Times, Magnum (on the East Coast), has recently ventured into the world of e-commerce. Beginning with his own IRC Network (irc.portalx.org), he has built the PortalX.org name into a solid web presence. While his new store offers many many things, we are mostly interested here at the exciting selection of foodstuffs available there. Everything from gourmet cheeses for you uptown readers to bunker rations for our doomsday scenario readers.

PortalX Store Main Entrance

Fine Looking Piece Of Meat

We received an anonymously submitted photo of what appears to be a slab of prime rib being cooked off. The staff here all agrees it looks delicious. Please post your opinions using the comments link below.

More Info on Ted's SteakHouse From Reader

The Fat Pride Times has gotten lucky and had a reader send in some more info on this unique restaurant. While we have never been there, it appears this restaurant is very popular, offers souviner items and now has 3 locations! Hopefully this reader will keep sending me more info. The team here is not finding much new via the search engines. Here is a sample of the menu we found on fhwrdh.net:

10 oz. porterhouse steak

6 oz., 7 oz. or 8 oz. steak grilled with mushrooms and onions, served with a baked potato wrapped in tinfoil

gorgonzola and garlic salad

ice cream that we keep in the freezer just like you do at home

chunky rodeo chicken kids meal

the ted - captain morgans (or myers) rum and coke with a cherry

the bell - vodka and orange juice

the ted jr. - a glass of 7up

the theodora - a cream soda

french fries

fishsticks

a basket of rolls with butter and a butter knife (for mom).

Reader Recommends: Ted's of Beverly Hills (Bar & Steakhouse)

One of our readers has written in to let us know about his favorite restaurant in Los Angeles, 'Ted's of Beverly Hills'. This restaurant is considered a 5 star white tablecloth establishment and our reader highly endorses it. Apparently, Ted's was the first restaurant to serve baked potatoes in the aluminum foil wrapper, something that is now the standard at all restaurants. This was many of the restaurant firsts that Ted's introduced to the hospitality industry. The website fhwrdh.net also notes that this establishment also was the first to serve: rum and coke mixed together (called the "ted" - meyer's rum and coke), the steak sandwich and the gorgonzola and garlic salad. Fhwrdh.net also notes that Ted's introduced the serrated knife to the steak world, was the first to put lemon juice on shrimp cocktail and was the first to use two salad forks in the place settings. We will have more info to come including a partial copy of the menu.

Thanksgiving: Canada Edition

Our regular Canadian contributor Jackball has once again served an excellent meal with documentation for us all. The above photos were prepared from the following recipe:

Prepare Stuffing

4 cups bread crumbs, 1/4 lb bacon, 1/3 cup chopped onion, 2 tbls chopped celery, 1/4 cup warm butter, 1/2 tsp parsley flakes, pepper, salt, 1/3 cup warm milk.In a big bowl mix the ingredients, bread crumbs should be mushy when done.

Stuff the Turkey, cook at 375 for 4 hours depending on size of bird.

The staff here at The Fat Pride Times found some history on the Canadian Thanksgiving on twilightbridge.com:

In Canada Thanksgiving is celebrated on the second Monday in October. Unlike the American tradition of remembering Pilgrims and settling in the New World, Canadians give thanks for a successful harvest. The harvest season falls earlier in Canada compared to the United States due to the simple fact that Canada is further north.

The history of Thanksgiving in Canada goes back to an English explorer, Martin Frobisher, who had been trying to find a northern passage to the Orient. He did not succeed but he did establish a settlement in Northern America. In the year 1578, he held a formal ceremony, in what is now called Newfoundland, to give thanks for surviving the long journey. This is considered the first Canadian Thanksgiving. Other settlers arrived and continued these ceremonies. He was later knighted and had an inlet of the Atlantic Ocean in northern Canada named after him - Frobisher Bay.

At the same time, French settlers, having crossed the ocean and arrived in Canada with explorer Samuel de Champlain, also held huge feasts of thanks. They even formed 'The Order of Good Cheer' and gladly shared their food with their Indian neighbours.

After the Seven Year's War ended in 1763, the citizens of Halifax held a special day of Thanksgiving.

The remains of the world's oldest noodles have been unearthed in China!

The BBC News website has breaking food news: "The 50cm-long, yellow strands were found in a pot that had probably been buried during a catastrophic flood.

Radiocarbon dating of the material taken from the Lajia archaeological site on the Yellow River indicates the food was about 4,000 years old.

Scientists tell the journal Nature that the noodles were made using grains from millet grass - unlike modern noodles, which are made with wheat flour.

The discovery goes a long way to settling the old argument over who first created the string-like food.

Visit the link below for full story.

The remains of the world's oldest noodles have been unearthed in China.

Proper Ginger Quantity For Maximum Teriyaki Chicken Over Rice Flavor

Above I have posted a picture of a standard teriyaki chicken meal from a local casual restaurant. I ordered this to go and helped myself to the ginger you see massed upon the top. This is the official Fat Pride Times recommended serving size of ginger per teriyaki chicken meal for maximum enjoyment.

Homemade Whole Chicken Fat Pride Times Style

All this chatter about whole birds led me to make my own over the weekend. Above is a picture of my whole bird before cooking. Unfortunately, I macked the whole thing then remembered I forgot to take a picture of it when it was done.

Reader Picture: Balinese Chicken (Indonesian)

One of our international readers has submitted the above photo of a dish called Balinese Chicken - an Indonesian recipe. The staff will be researching this dish and posting more info shortly.

Wasabi - Genuine or Fake? The Truth Is Out

After enjoying some of what we thought was authentic Wasabi paste and some California Roll Sushi in The FatPride Times breakroom a little research led to some interesting results. Genuine Wasabi is not easily found - what we had was horseradish and food coloring being sold as Wasabi. From the website freshwasabi.com: "Don't be fooled. The green smooth textured clump on the side of your sushi dish is rarely real wasabi. More commonly it is ordinary horseradish with food coloring added. Real wasabi is one of the rarest and most difficult vegetables in the world to grow. Few geographical areas are suited for growing wasabi. We are fortunate that our micro climate in Florence, Oregon is ideally suited for growing fresh wasabi".

Lesson to be learned is something about watching something or other - you know what we mean. Looking at the ingredients listing on our box of Wasabi found us with horseradish and food coloring.

The Flying Pie Pizzeria Review - 5 Stars

Wow, I had heard that these guys made an excellent pie but I have heard that so many times I never really believe it. These guys are for real. The pepperoni pizza is layered with cheese and pepperoni so thick that 2 slices will fill you up at first, and maybe a third a few minutes later. Very impressive and a 5 star ranking by The Fat Pride Times.

From their webpage:"Our Pizza Dough is homemade and hand-rolled daily. Fresh vegetables are cut and prepared each day. We use only 100% whole milk Mozzarella, Provolone and Romano Cheeses, and our meats are of the highest quality available. Our goal is to serve you the finest products and create an enjoyable atmosphere in which to serve you."

They have four locations:"The Portland Flying Pie Pizzeria is our first restaurant, where we have been serving our original secret pizza dough and sauce for over 20 years. Come see our new(huge)dining room. Issaquah is located just southeast of downtown Seattle, nudging the foothills of the Snoqualmie National Forest. It may be our #2 Flying Pie Pizzeria, but it is in no way second rate.The Lake Oswego Flying Pie Pizzeria is our #3 location —in the Lake Oswego Towne Square shopping center of Mountain Park. We hope you'll add their pizza to your list of tastful delights.Per your request, the Gresham Flying Pie Pizzeria (#4) is NOW OPEN and serving you the same great pies, with the same secret sauce, the same choice of crusts and deep toppings you crave -- without the drive across town." (Issaquah is in Washington State - the rest are in Oregon).

Bread and Milk Bowl?

I recently was on a social visit to a prospective new staff member's home and witnessed something I found very odd. This person took some regular sliced bread and crumbled it onto bite-size pieces and put them in a large bowl. Then milk was poured over them and they were macked on like one might eat cold cereal. I am always open to new ideas, and maybe this is an old one even, but this really put me off my lunch. Has anyone else seen this move?

OMG

OMG

Tapatio Hot Sauce - 5 Star Ranking

This stuff is the real deal. Nuff said. Comes in three sizes: mini, regular and 40 oz. Available most markets. From http://www.tapatiohotsauce.com

Give a kick to the taste of whatever you've got . . .It's not too mild and it's not too hot . . .Tap into the taste of Tapatío.

Tapatío Hot Sauce adds a kick to whatever you're craving! Our special recipe enhances but never overpowers . . .With the perfect balance between mild and wild! Tapatío Hot Sauce is going to take your taste buds to another level. So Tap into the taste of Tapatío!.

Jose-Luis Saavedra Sr. started the Tapatío Hot Sauce Company in 1971 as a privately held business and it continues being that way. The product's name " Tapatío " means a person born in Guadalajara, capital of the state of Jalisco in Mexico.

The beginning was humble, Mr. Saavedra started his business in a rented 485 square-foot building in Maywood, California and began the manufacturing and distribution of this popular hot sauce from this small industrial warehouse. He continued to work out of that site for the next fourteen years. The Tapatío Hot Sauce Company's modest beginnings were tumultuous to say the least. On a good day only several cases were produced. As sales increased, Tapatío required more help and the family responded; Jose-Luis Saavedra Jr. gave up his profession as a physician to become General Manager.

In 1985, the company moved to a new 7,800 square-foot location in Vernon, California, just 5 miles away from Downtown, Los Angeles. The building was much bigger than the first location, but it had only a single loading dock and limited storage space, which created a new series of problems for the company. Consequently, it was time to look for a larger place that would provide enough space to meet the company's current requirements and ever-growing needs. After a long search a site was found where a developer would build to suit the spacious new 30,000 square-foot facility that Tapatío presently occupies. It is a brand new state-of-the-art facility with several loading docks and a fully automated production line; the company that was founded in 1971 has evolved into a modern plant. In addition, Tapatío now has added help from Mr. Saavedra's two daughters; Dolores uses her law degree to handle all of the company's legal matters while Jacquie runs the business office.

Tapatío currently distributes nationally and has begun exporting to Mexico, Canada, Central America and some countries in Europe.

Visit the website for more info, history and cool t-shirts!

College Student Reader Needs Recipes

One of our loyal readers is currently attending college and has told the staff here that he needs some new ideas & recipes for quality food at reasonable prices. We suggested he go with the homemade salad and sandwiches plan as many of the ingredients can be used in both and 10.00 worth of supplies can make a lot of meals. However, we need some hot foods to suggest and some other ideas. Please help out a fellow reader and post your ideas using the comments word/link below. You dont have to sign-up to leave a comment - its real simple. (FYI: the photo above is not of the reader in need of recipes)

We Have a Nice Toaster Recommendation

Reader Magnum, who wrote about the problems he had with the Toastmaster toaster and uneven toasting results, has now found a winning toaster that makes the FatPride Times cut. The "GE Classic 4-Slice Toaster" is now in his kitchen and toasting it up proper. Magnum recommends it for anyone who likes fully toasted bread - which should be everyone.

Cake Photo by Bruss "International Traveler"

Our roving international correspondant Bruss sent along this photo of a cake he macked on awhile back and regretfully the staff here misplaced until today. This cake is long gone by now.

Magnums's Microwave Cheeseburger Endorsement

Regular reader and contributor Magnum has reported with some interesting info for us. He has tried the Hormel brand frozen/microwave cheeseburgers and says:"These burgers for something that is already made and microwaveable are delicious. i would give them a 10+"

For cooking he recommends:" 1 minute 20 seconds in the microwave if you have an 1100 watt one and do not sit it on a paper towel like it says wrap it in a paper towel then cook it, if not the bun will come out hard". Nice work as always from Magnum

The Hill People & Crazy Food Canning

Our international correspondant from New Zealand has pointed us to a webpage that tells the tale of some mountain folk and canning/preserving foodstuffs gone mad. The following info was found on the tristateneighbor.com website.

"This year they helped plant the garden. I increased the garden size to accommodate our goal of entering 500 jars of canned goods at the fair this year," Maurer said.

"Last winter we canned venison, spaghetti sauce, pizza sauce, chili sauce, tomato soup, turkey, catsup, barbecue sauce, fish, sweet potatoes, duck, butternut squash, pumpkins and potatoes. You might say that whatever we find, we can. The entries will help out the competition at the fair and it will give the boys a little bit of income," said Maurer.

"I had never canned jams and jellies so we tried that. This year we are going to add jalapeno pepper jelly and canned squirrel. The canned squirrel was Smokey's idea. We asked the Fair Board to add it to the list of acceptable items and they did," Maurer said.

"This is a hands-on experience for the boys. They help plant the crop, pick the crop and can the crop. They label, wipe jars off and go with me to enter at the fair. There is hardly anything that can't be canned. We may try canning cauliflower and broccoli this year also," she said.

Ok, the key issue above, incase you missed it is canned squirrel. Holy christ man. I like squirrels and I feed them in my yard. However, they are basically rats with bigger tails in my opinion. The lasy says "You might say that whatever we find, we can", which also troubles me as I can only wonder what she has told us about.

Chicken Sausage Over Linguine

Just a quick picture of a meal we prepared here in the test kitchens at The FatPride Times Headquarters. Was simple yet excellent meal: tomato sauce - pasta - chicken sausgaes.

Toastmaster 4 slot toaster: Pure Rubbish

Longtime reader Magnum reports to us that you should not buy the Toastmaster 4 slot toaster - pictured above. Simply put: "you put the bread in and it comes out toasted only 3/4 of the way from the bottom". That doesnt cut it. Toastmaster says: "The Toastmaster name stands for a celebration of innovation, designed to serve your life and keep you cooking in style. This stylish 4-slice toaster with chrome features is a testament to Toastmaster dedication to form and function in the kitchen". Our readers have experienced otherwise. Thanks to Magnum for the fair warning!

Weekend Binge Fast Food Festival

I gave the staff here at the FatPride Times the whole weekend off, so not much has gotten done blog wise. However, I did some fierce eating. Above is 2 large Quiznos subs abd 3 Carl's Jr. Classic Bacon Cheeseburgers. Couldnt get a Pepsi Max to go with though.